What is with me and sad posts latelty??

I promise you, Ill try to quit with the sad themed posts!

This is a poem I wrote about 5 years back now.. Im sure all of you have a loved one or have known someone who passed away to cancer... Sadly I have had 2 people close to me who passed away to cancer..

I wrote this with inspiration to keep awareness that we all need to donate money and pray to god for the cure!

xx

I told you mom
I told you I wouldn’t be alright
I always knew I’d end up dieing
Although I did my best to keep up this fight

I can feel it mom
It’s getting harder as I try to breath
It’s getting all blurry.. even harder for me to see
Im wishing dieing could be painless… like going in a deep sleep.

I wish this on no one mommy
It’s so hard, having to leave
There is so much I will miss
Like my boyfriend giving me his last kiss

Why are you crying mommy?
Im not dead yet..
Sorry, I am really trying to speak out loud
But.. I..I just cant…

Look there is the doctor passing by
Mom, I do wish you’ll let him know that he did try,
In fact mom, I think ..
I think yesterday I even saw him cry

I don’t know where Im about to go,
When I leave this life
My dreams are all fading away before my eyes
Mom.. this pain is like being stabbed with hundred thousand knives

Mom can you tell my daddy
Tell him that I really wont be that far
How I regret making him angry , whenever I used to stay late at some bar.

And my brothers and sisters mommy I love them so much
Tell them to be brave
And when life gets hard for them
Mommy do let them know they can still visit me on my grave

On my grave mom, I want you to write about my friends
How much I love them and think they were the best
If I leave without saying goodbye
Let them know Ill be watching from heaven when I die

Why me mommy?
I really don’t want to go
I want live my dreams
There is so much more about life I d like to know

You know what doesn’t seem fair mom?
That there are so many people who take their lives for granted
Alcoholics and Drug addicts, do they now its not right??
And those people who wish to die…I m dieing but how I wish I could stay alive.

Oh mom! I don’t know what more to say
I am scared because I don’t know whats on my way
Im dieing and im so unprepared

Im trying to be strong
Im trying hard not to let tears fall
But you’re breaking my heart mommy
Seeing you cry and all

I wish you could be happy and that I didnt have to make you this sad
I wish my boyfriend to hold me as I lay here and die
I want to let him know I love him
But I’d hate to see him cry

You know what I really wish mom
That you heard all these words as Im fading away
I love you mom…
Cry no more..Maybe I will see you again someday

- Ness